"It’s too big. You could fight it, but it feels like there is no point in trying. There is just no point. You want to get through it, but you might aswell do nothing because it will only tire you more. It’s powerlessness"
“Ofcourse I was very sad aswell. But I had the most difficulties with the emptiness. There really was no emotion at all.
"I wasn’t in the now. I wasn’t there anymore.”
“Most of the time all off these toughts and feelings are contained.
It stays inside and I manage to repress it. But somtimes there are streaks where everything comes tumbling out all at once.”
“You know you’re not nice to be around, so you want them to get what is going on with you. But they don’t and that is very painful.”
“I was always looking for something to be worried about, even when there was nothing wrong. I tried to silence it, but when I couldn’t it felt even worse. Because I thought, how can I do anything
if I can’t even stop my brain”
"It feels like you are in a dream, like you are standing outside of yourself. As if you are looking over your own shoulder.
There is this distance from everything"
“I had all these thoughts and feelings all the time. They were consuming me. There were times where I felt like I couldn’t breathe, like the air wasn’t entering my lungs anymore. It felt like something had a hold of my throat. I couldn’t breathe, I couldn’t speak, I couldn’t cry.
I couldn’t do anything.”
“People seem to think that you’re just a bit unhappy. While for you, it really feels like you won’t make it to the end of the week"